the living being had no need of eyes because there was nothing outside of him to be seen, nor of ears because there was nothing to be heard

i am more honest than my father
less stable than my mother
i have a girl i could marry
but i cannot love her

she is an innocent pup
i have left in the snow

watch from the window
as i circle like crows
circle above warm meat
hungry
i would not wish this upon you
but i do
circle still as a serpent
inside myself
deprecating body

i am Goliath
hear my scream
as i gnaw on my feet
i am a self-inflicted dying beast
building and trampling dreams of my Babel
a place where god lives, underwater, my still euphoric dream
the beginning and the ending of me

i am a starving tick
blood sucking
what are the odds
surviving love in a looney bin
a heavy sponge collecting anything
what is fair
in lacking empathy
in degenerative disease

i cannot love her
with what is inside of me